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  • Writer's pictureEddie Fogler

House of Poison and Spice Part 5

My neck nearly snaps as Viceroy X aggressively whips me around. “Joan, get everyone out! Hurry!”

I look over his shoulder at the startled passengers. They’re all halfway out of their seats staring at us. Viceroy X shifts his weight to his side and gives me the nod to move ahead.

“Everyone out.” I say, a little too timidly. No one moves. As I step pass Viceroy X, he gives me a small pat on my ass causing me to use my aggression towards him to scream louder. “I said everyone out!”

The passengers scurry out immediately. They step over each other and desperately try to squeeze out of the car all at once, as I keep screaming for them to get out. As soon as the car is clear, Viceroy X puts his hands on his hips and bends over. He raises back up as he sucks in as much air as he can. In true Viceroy X fashion, he lets out a loud, obnoxious burp, releasing his potent nerve gas into the car.

“That should slow her down,” he says as he exits the car with me.

“Who is that?” I ask as I follow him.

“No idea.” He continues to let out little burps as he runs. “The girls I date are always left satisfied.”

I really wish the mystery girl would kill him. Or at least shoot one of her ball things through his vocal cords. Unfortunately, there’s no sign of her.

Viceroy X kicks open one of the windows in the next car. “You ready?”

He grabs a suitcase from the overhead compartments and uses it to punch out the rest of the glass. He picks me up and holds me out of the window. I look up to see a rope ladder dangling from a helicopter. How the fuck did he manage to summon a rescue? I grab ahold of the ladder and start climbing up.

“I can see up your dress,” Viceroy X shouts as he crawls up behind me.

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